Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Hate Mail

"Go to hell. I spend as much time as I can wih my son. Yes other people watch him while I am at school and work, I don't have a fucking rich stuck up husband to pay my bills and take me to Hawaii. Nathaniel likes playing with his friends.I'm not going to be a bitch like you and isolate him his whole life."

That email was from about two years ago. It came out of the blue when I told her that she could get a better guy. I didn't say why to her I just kept it short and sweet but I did it because on the guys facebook pictures showed that he was a cheater.
To clarify we have only gone to Hawaii once and our friends invited us so all that we had to pay for was food and the air fair. We were able to stay in military housing so it was an affordable vacation. My husband works hard for what we have. Being a wife and mother is just as hard because you are the one that needs to make sure that everything is running smoothly. A mother is not a part time job. I get to pay the bills, go on play dates, cook for the family, feed the family, clean, budget, shop. I am sure the list goes on and on. And it's ok for me to isolate Nathaniel because I am not his parent, she is. Aunts are not that important, mothers are. Not everyone has an Aunt.

"This is for everyone else, because I've finally realized my sisters true colors and yeah it hurts but I'm moving on.
You see, when everyone got married that one year, I made huge sacrifices. I flew from Alabama to Utah with an infant. I had to run through airports to catch flights. I had to go through a random search on my way to your wedding. I had to strip Nathaniel to a diaper, have a diaper bag and car seat searched, and be patted down. I was just the random person. But what really sucks is I could have saved hundreds of dollars. You see, about the time everyone got engaged, Rachel got engaged too. She got married about 2 weeks after you. I don't remember who announced their engagements first, to me it didn't matter. I couldn't afford or physically handle another trip & wedding with an infant. I told her my sisters were priority. Evidentally I should have gone to hers and not yours, she is still my best friend, and you treat your family like garbage.
And another thing, evidentally Randy didn't notice Marilyn choking. Despite what you need to tell yourself to make yourself feel better about being a bitch, Randy is not psycho. He was probably off in his own world. If he had headphones on, I can guarantee he didn't hear her. If he was playing on his DS, he wouldn't notice a parade walk right in front of him. I don't know the circumstances cause I just heard this through the grapevine, but Ive seen Randy around kids.
And last thing, I didn't just block you from FB. I blocked you the day I found out about the choking incident. Its been a week or two.
I'm suppose to apologize for blocking you on FB, but I'm NOT sorry. I'm sorry I put up with your crap so long. I'm sorry I'm not as perfect as you think you are. And I don't want to be. And I'm sorry you think my family is so screwed up. And lastly, I think you need to apologize to YOUR family for treating them the way you do. Especially your mother!"

This one was from about a week ago. I get these emails too often. I called my mom asking her if she felt like I treated her bad and she said that she was sorry that I got the email. Right before all of her acting up I told her that I didn't think it would be appropriate for me to make her wedding cake topper. I kept it at that. My mom said that my sister is way upset because we are not going to her wedding. I can say so many mean things. This makes it so I don't want to go even more. One of the main reasons that we are not going is because of fiances. We just can't afford to go out whenever anyone pleases. It cost about 300 bucks or more just to go up there. She gave me about a month and a half notice for the date but nine months ago she said that she was going to have the wedding the same week of my cousin Tanya's wedding. I went to Tanya's wedding while my husband stayed home and worked. I feel like Tanya made more of an effort. Tanya and her now husband had a set date for their wedding for a year. And I told her when she asked me to come that I would. They were living a courting lifestyle and were able to set a good example for my children to see. I can not say the same for my sister. I do want to influence my children to choose the right. Once my sister learns morality, I will then feel like she has learned.
Randy is not a phycho: he's a lazy, fat, un-alert, boy with no ambition that feels like he deserves things that other people have that he has not earned. And yes, I am an OVERPROTECTIVE PARANOID BITCH! (The emails that randy sent me said that I was paranoid... oops, I wasn't suppose to put his name. Now you know.)
She did go to my wedding but that was her choice. My kids get carsick, that is way worse than striping down a baby to a diaper in a airport that has central air. I think it's way worse to ask the gas station worker for a hose to wash out a car seat and then give a baby a bath in the bathroom sink.
I guess I should be happy that I have less drama now because the whole fact that she isn't talking to me. I feel sorry for her son. That is a whole other story.

To be honest I am alittle bit crushed about the whole thing but I talked it over with my husband and I think he is right about the whole thing. About not being around people that drag you down. It is always better to be around uplifting people and maybe I should make a goal to do that. I love my freinds. When some of my freinds come out to California I have a better chance of seeing them of when my family comes out. I know I have said this before but I really do need to make more of an effort for the people that uplift me.


dannyscotland said...

Wow. That's pretty awful stuff. What a shame that your family seems to feel like it's okay to treat people so unkindly. I hope that you will have the strength and conviction to do whatever you know or feel is right.

Jen said...

I havn't responded to the emails. I just figure that my sister is nuts and she goes through these phases. I laugh because most of the things are so far fetched. For example, she tried spreading a roumor that me and her ex were having a sexual affair. No one belived it because it's obvious that I wouldn't ever do that.

I figure that everyone has a person in their life that they love but they also need to keep their distance.